Yes, this is an Onion story and it takes things to a ridiculous extreme, but I think every author has felt they’ve desperately lost their way in describing something some time or another. Thankfully, that’s what editing is for.

They moved closer now, and their shadows stretched across the sand, twin silhouettes cut from the same canvas. She laid her finger hub across his tentative, dandelion hands and then slowly let that glorious gripping machine tighten like a mighty vise until at last she could feel that their spirits, too, were entwined, just like their touching-organs were, except emotionally instead of physically.

via Frustrated Novelist No Good At Describing Hands | The Onion – America’s Finest News Source.